Acts of kindness ideas for parents that won’t add to the mental load
Parenting is full of conflicts, isn't it? While many of us realise we should be taking more time for self care, we’re often ignoring it because we’re putting the health and happiness of others first. Naturally, our Mum-level kindness extends beyond the family home, but the need or want to extend help and heartfelt consideration to others can add to the already heavy mental load.
As we approach World Kindness Day on 13 November, we take a look at how kindness can start at home and some free or low-cost acts of kindness ideas that don’t require much of your time and energy.
First, let’s talk about stress
Cortisol is our body’s main stress hormone, and when we’ve too much for too long it can start to have a detrimental effect on our health, from low energy levels to mood irregularities and weight gain. Perpetual kindness has been proven to reduce levels of cortisol by up to 23% in our body and has other benefits too:
slower ageing
increased self-esteem
living longer
better heart health
closer connections with people.
As parents, we’re susceptible to additional stress and pressure in our daily lives. Dependents are very dependent and time and headspace has become more valuable than money.
You have a list of non-negotiable tasks and responsibilities daily, and someone always wants something from you. What left do you have to give? Remember, when your actions are coupled with kindness (being gentle, caring, and helpful), it can have a positive effect on your mental health as a parent - and when you’re in a good place, those around you are too.
So, how can you make time for kindness?
The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation is starting a kindness revolution at home. As parents, guardians or primary carers you’ve a wonderful opportunity to lead the way. They’ve a range of really helpful resources, from a downloadable programme covering six kindness concepts, to a regular newsletter, colouring sheets and calendar of activities you can do as a family.
Being kind to each other, talking about kindness and acknowledging acts of kindness is a great place to start. If you want to go a step further, here are some ideas and inspiration for the next time you want to give something back to your loved ones, colleagues or local community.
10 free acts of kindness ideas - they won’t cost you a penny
Send a message, voice note or write a letter to a friend or colleague you’ve not been in contact with for a while - let them know you’re thinking of them.
Offer to walk your neighbours children to childcare or school with you. That short bit of time might mean the difference between a hot or cold cuppa that day.
Invite a friend for a walk. The fresh air, conversation and exercise will help reduce stress, boost your wellbeing and reduce any feelings of isolation you might experience as a parent.
Host a clothes swap and give your friends, colleagues and fellow parents the opportunity to offload their unwanted clothing and feel good in something new, and free. It’s better for the environment than fast fashion - win, win.
Pick some flowers from your garden and make a posy. The best ones are always wrapped in a bit of tin foil with soggy cotton wool at the stalks!
Offer to do some chores for a new parent, whether it’s a quick vacuum or popping on a load of washing. Every little helps.
Volunteer for a local charity or school or work event. You might meet some new people too.
Get the kids to draw a picture for a neighbour, or post positive messages in your window for passers by to see.
Support a small business on social media by sharing their posts and news.
Keep it simple and just smile at a stranger. Feeling brave? Offer them a compliment if you feel inspired to do so.
10 acts of kindness ideas for under a fiver
“I was once chatting to someone at work about ‘avocado hand’. I’d heard about it on the radio and mentioned that I too had caused myself an injury cutting an avo in half. A few days later, I had a new (and safe) avocado cutter on my desk. It was such a thoughtful gift, it was just lovely!”
Pop into your local coffee shop and pick up a friend or colleague’s favourite drink for a doorstep drop off or quick catch-up.
Offer to buy some basic groceries, such as milk and bread.
Buy a small bunch of flowers to brighten someone’s day. It doesn’t have to be someone you know - the Lonely Bouquet is a great movement where flowers are left with a note for strangers to take home.
Buy someone a gift that shows you’ve listened to them.
Bake a cake or something sweet and deliver it to a friend or neighbour.
Cook a homemade meal and deliver it to someone who needs it.
Donate food to your local food bank.
Take your little ones on a coffee date for a babyccino or hot chocolate.
Make a small donation to a new charity.
Gift someone their shopping trolley at the supermarket. A little goes a long way.
“I once sat in the car park in Tesco trying to breastfeed a screaming baby who was inconsolable. She was only a few months old so I was exhausted. People were constantly walking past the car and could clearly see me fighting with my small human. Eventually she fed and fell asleep, but I didn’t dare move or even put the engine on - it was freezing as it was the middle of winter. I just sat in the front seat holding her and was miserable. Then I heard a tap on the window and a lady had bought me a hot chocolate to help keep me warm and she told me I was doing a great job!”
Be kind to yourself
There’s one thing to remember when you’re considering acts of kindness for others, and that’s to check in whether you’re being kind enough to yourself. If you’re not spending time on your own health and happiness, you can’t do the same for others without risking more damage to yourself. So take time out when you can, and treat yourself when you need a boost. You can find some ‘me time’ ideas for busy parents on our blog.
Are you in?
The Mental Health Foundation says “now is the time to re-imagine a kinder society that better protects our mental health” - and when it can be done so easily with such far reaching benefits, we couldn't agree more.
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